Wowzerz!

It was a cold gloomy morning in mid July and I was just waking up from my dreamy sleep with my beautiful wife Martha, I decided to check my myspace before I went to work this time, so as normal I opened up the browser and put up myspace... but little did I know that it was actually the beginning of a horrific series of events in my life, and by doing the simple act of casually checking a bulliten I single hand-ly destroyed my life. The bulliten looked like one of those retarded chain letters that everyone hates, but I actually read this one through, maybe it was pity on the person that enticed me to read it, or maybe it was just my own burried deep feeling of fear of that letter, but whatever it was I wish that I could over come my complex emotions... It was a basic chain letter, stating about reposting the letter within one hour or the person you love most will die. Noticing the time I realized I was going to be late to work if I kept reading bullitens started by lifeless drones who had nothing better to do than to post simplistic letters trying to scare people. It was the normal day at work... suck this, and put this down there, and just as my client was about to finish paying, my boss came walking down the hall with a grim look on his face, it filled me with dread. But this dread was different it wasn't the dread of having to think you might have to speak to your boss, it was a dread that I couldn't really classify at the time, but it was actually the dread that the person you loved most just died... I got home in a cold sweat, time must have stopped itself because I was stuck in that one hour for all of my life, I just still couldn't believe that she was gone, I opened myspace in a strange sort of way, I didn't know if it was safe to ever look at it again, it filled me with fear. I went back to his bulliten, went to his profile, got his name, and looked him up in the phonebook, I got in my car and headed for his house. Upon finally reaching his house I decided I was going to go through with it no matter what... I opened the front door ever so quietly, I slowly made it inside, I made my way to the finally door that I would have to open, I slowly creaked it open and I took out my knife, then I attacked! I ripped the box open and all the Mountain dew came crashing out I then grabbed all the kool aid I could carry and I dashed out toward the garage where I could escape, but then I knew the cops would be tracking my car, so I couldn't take that, just as the footsteps that were edging ever closer since I grabbed all the drinks were just about to reach me, I decided to take a bike sitting ever so perfectly upright, as if to say "take me" As I rode away into the night, I realized that my whole life I once had, a beautiful wife, a big house, a sick set of wheels, was gone, all I had now was 7 dented cans of mountain dew revolution, kool aid, and a bike. But I knew tat this wasn't enough, I then realized I would have to make my living stealing all of these things again and again in order to survive. And surviving is what all humans have programmed into their brains, so it leaves me with the only choice, to steal to stay alive.